Metiria reasoned that Key’s third term as prime minister would be beleaguered with official probes, court cases and more whistle-blowing related to the Dirty Politics scandal. “I knew what she had to say to be true,” said Key. “So did those in the National Party and the oligarchs [super-rich people who steer politics] that constitute the New Zealand economy’s ‘Twenty Ruling Families’.”
With the famously territorial tui birds singing their sexually-charged songs as they walked around Wellington’s Botanical Gardens at dusk on Friday September 26, their springtime discussion quickly became a question of how such an improbable union could occur.
Key says he admired Turei’s forthrightness and ability to grip his balls while articulating a sophisticated argument. “You never see that kind of maneuver in parliament, in courtrooms or in TV studios. Public debate has become so wanky and its always promising prosperity for everyone in some vague and undefined future, like a secular form of the Vatican Empire’s mythical Heaven. Her gift is to embody the political present in this outpost of the Fourth British Empire and 1st American Empire, which is indebted to foreign pixies”.
The Green’s co-leader convinced New Zealand’s prime minister that the only way his party could survive a third term and for himself and key insiders to keep their white privileged wobbly arses out of jail, was for his Tory-modeled, blue-coloured National Party to merge with the neo-liberally captured environmentally half-conscious Green Party. Turei explained that the Green’s could do for the National Party what New Zealand’s anti-nuclear movement did for the United States and the United Kingdom when New Zealand joins them in wars largely of NATO’s scheming: make them look good.
Key asked Turei, “I’m hardly a thoroughbred, so what’s in it for you? Aren’t you risking alienating yourself from the Green-skins?”
Smart Green Economy or Totalitarian Nightmare?
Turei explained to Key ‘the market’ was the most efficient way to confront the major issues of sustainability. According to Turei, Key sniggered. Annoyed, the Green’s co-leader “educated” Key that the only way to fix the planet was to make big polluters pay through is through a carbon credits trading system.
Meanwhile, Turei told him, “an international price on carbon is coming, which means every single thing on the planet will be measured and priced for its carbon-equivalent Smart Green Economy value.”
Being a shrewd ex-London and Wall Street banker, Key could see that what Turei was describing would require a worldwide technocratic superstructure. He already knew that. It had long been planned.
The CEO of NZ Inc., as Key likes to think of himself, says he smiled when he realized that Turei’s obliviousness about the construction of technocratic super-states was, in effect, confirmation that the New Zealand economy’s environmental movement did not understand what a technocracy is. “You’d think tree-huggers would read Patrick Wood’s stuff”, Key said referring to the editor of The August Forecast & Review, who traces the roll-out of Smart Grid technologies to the roots of a little-known technocracy movement back in the Great Depression era.
“Wood. Tree-huggers. Get it?” asked the Smiling Assassin, who seemed oblivious to how Jokes get killed. I explained that when a Joke gets explained, it quickly dies an unfunny death, humiliated. Key snorted. It didn’t help. The Joke stayed dead.
In the hope that this recently deceased Joke’s short life was not lost in vain, Professor of International Criminal Law at Auckland University Dr. David Lynchman gives an unfunny definition so that people who still read will learn something crucial to avert the intended technocratic nightmare. “At face value, a technocracy suggests a benign economic system that allocates energy and resources equitably through quotas, rather than through capitalism’s current price system.”
“The amusing thing is that a technocracy is a totalitarian system of government that is administered by scientists, engineers and technicians”, said Key. “It’s amusing because it leaves the same unseen oligarchs that have become super-rich off capitalism still at-large, to have their same scheming private bat dinners at the same bat locations all around Gotham and its satellites.”
Turei at this point had zoned out and was watching a Reconstruction video about Nicki Minaj’s ‘Anaconda’ and One Direction’s ‘You & I’ songs. The production made her giggle – a lot.
Key continued, “By its very design, Smart Green Economies will be controlled by technocrats, engineers and scientists who would be working, whether they realize or not, to ensure that ordinary people and the things they consume are tracked everywhere because everything will be chipped with its own unique number and read by wireless chipped Smart Readers. It will mean the complete loss of anonymity, privacy, and dignity – if we get away with it”.
In this New World Order, laws have been incrementally passed to set the totalitarian trap shut on people who simply break sparkly greenwashed Future City codes for protesting, says Lynchman. It is intended that the freedom to dissent will become highly risky because the world’s police forces are being steadily militarized with the spectre of terrorism, much of it conducted by ‘deep-state’ actors from the North Atlantic Alliance.
Meanwhile, mass publics have been deliberately demoralized, distracted and disenfranchised in order to avert a global counter-movement to the silent ‘free market’ revolution, in accordance with the ‘1980s Project’ (first reported upon by Laurence Shoup and William Minter in their 1977 book, Imperial Brain Trust), explained Key.
“Most Muggles and Hobbits have experiences but miss their meanings”, said the Smiling Assassin smiling. “It’s a foible that elite policy planners rely on to keep mass populaces in holding patterns”.
Not surprisingly, Key says he liked Turei’s idea to create an ‘Aqua Alliance’ because he saw in it a new mechanism for such a ‘holding pattern’. Indeed, the Smiling Assassin liked the Green co-leader’s idea so much he exclaimed, “You ripper!” and the pair got into the spirit of spring on a leafy bed prepared by the Seven Sisters of Papatūānuku.
Turei and Key rooted among the native trees in the Seduction, the Fantastic Rocking Horse, and the Splitting Bamboo sex positions of Karma Sutra fame.
During these sex positions, Turei gave Key a new creation to get him through the repercussions of the Dirty Politics scandal. She calls her creation the ‘Blue Steely Resolve Face Look’, which Key had “down-pat” by the time they had finished consummating their Political Sex Partnership (PSP). (See accompanying story: ‘Blue Steely Resolve Face Look’).
New Zealand’s first ‘Aqua Couple’ said they had been “testing the water” before announcing it to their respective parties, and the public, in keeping with the New Zealand economy’s role in the global economy as a live experimental lab to test new technologies, ideas and propaganda before the world gets hit with them.
“It’s been a wonderful couple of months”, said Turei. “Except, for the weird totalitarian nightmares that I keep having when my head is close to John’s. They are like a fusion of Bladerunner, Brave New World, Nineteen Eighty-four, Neuromancer, THX-1138, and Jennifer Government. There’s an unsettling feeling to them, that unseen power brokers suck everyone into their ‘hi-tech dream-world’ – forever.”
“We’re like the lab rabbits”, said Key, “only Metiria and I are not being made to wear toxic make-up”.
“You would think that in capitalist societies where tricking your kids into believing that Santa is benign, it would make Hobbits and Muggles more skeptical about everything once they find out the whole world is in on the lie”, chuckled Key. “I mean, every grown-up now knows that Santa has out-sourced his vast manufacturing operations to the sweat-shops of perpetually developing Brown Economies, powered as they are by coal and oil. It’s a rich white man’s world”, and we lure Hobbits and Muggles with colours right from their very first Christmas when they all ignore the toys and play with the packaging”, sniggered the Smiling Assassin.
Amazonian-American journalist Sophia Bigg-Storm tried to break the story that World I and World II were conjured by an Anglo-American Brotherhood who conspired to dominate the world by controlling oil and finance, through a system enforced by military aggression, subversion and other intrigues. Bigg-Storm’s investigations were suppressed by her former employer, The National Enquirer, a newspaper that movie critics think is just make-believe because it was depicted in the film Citizen Kane. She was recently gifted Wonder Woman’s Lasso of Truth on a recent holiday to her ancestral home of Paradise Island, which is driving other reporters mad with envy. SEE: Snoopman News http://snoopman.net.nz